Cometh Forth, Decisions

The month that I’ve been waiting for since senior year started has finally come. I feel like March is that final moment, the one that shows me whether or not the last four years of my educational career was successful or not. Okay, that was a bit melodramatic, but you get my drift.

To be honest, I expected this month to be more exciting; I expected to be getting an adrenaline rush every time I saw a new email or a piece of mail from one of my colleges. But it’s been surprisingly calm, collected, if not a little stoic. Other than my most recent acceptance, which I literally screamed about from upstairs, causing my brother to run up and throw on his concerned-big-brother face, receiving my decisions has been like checking my ordinary mail. I’m not sure what to expect, but I also know that whatever the decision is, my life will only be altered in the way I want it to be.

I think the hardest thing about this month is not coping with my own rejections, but rather seeing how some of my closest friends cope with theirs. It’s difficult to find the right things to say, to show them that even though a specific school does not want them, that they still have so much opportunity to keep on going, to keep on collecting acceptance letters even if they have that one rejection. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve gotten rejected from UCLA, but to be honest, I wasn’t expecting myself to get in. It’s truly disheartening to set yourself up for failure, and of course there was still that tiny piece of me that hoped and hoped, but I was also being what I call a realist. During this time, I feel like that’s one of those things that’s keeping me going.

A few days ago, one of my friends even posted a joke about her rejection, showing that though she was disappointed, she wasn’t going to let one decision get the best of her, that she’d conquer it with how the handles her life: with an open mind and the ability to not let these little things get her down. She posted “WOW I GOT ACCEPTED IN UCI BUT THEY WORDED IT FUNNY THEY WERE LIKE ‘… WE’RE UNABLE TO OFFER YOU ADMISSION…'” which I thought was just the greatest thing ever because it was also the day that I got my rejection letter from UCLA.

Image

At the end of the day, I think the month of college acceptances truly opens up our eyes on how we deal with life and the decisions we make. Yes, it’s definitely hard knowing that certain schools don’t want you, but it’s a lot like when we start to work and we’re interviewing and interviewing for position after position, waiting to hear for the call back. In my own way, this month seems to be the most bittersweet my life has experienced.

 

Advertisements